The Corona Chronicles: A Quiet Place
When I watched Epiphany's live stream last week, I was so impressed with our church's ability to transmit our service to hundreds of people; some across the country, others on the other side of the world. I watched my fellow worship team singers sang and heard Pastor B preach an encouraging sermon and kept thinking how beautiful it was to see us all gathered virtually, in a community.
But it was a week later, in my quiet time, that I heard from God.
The prior week I had been stressed about work. I work in news (it never stops!) so I go in two days a week and work from home the other days. I was feeling despondent about being separated from my husband who's going through basic training for the military. I was sad I couldn't see my friends and worried about my grandparents. It was lovely to be able to be connected with my friends and family, yet I was feeling like I was on technology more than ever- always texting, facetiming, zooming, streaming...the omnipresence of technology was starting to feel smothering and before I knew it, it had been two days since I'd read my bible.
So, on this Sunday, I decided to unplug. I turned off my phone. No television, just the music I played to help usher me into worship. Inexplicably, I was drawn to Kirk Franklin's "More Than I Can Bear".
“I’ve been broken into pieces, seen lightning flashing from above. But through it all, I remember, that He loves me and he cares and He’ll never put more on me than I can bear.”
The flood started. I broke down into tears, praying and praising and I heard God's voice so clearly. That gratefulness I had been feeling so intensely for the past two weeks- grateful for a place to live, money to cover my needs, my health-- I realized in that moment that He wants me to feel that grateful for his provisions all the time. The empathy I was feeling for people who had lost their jobs, the health care workers who were risking their lives, those whose family members were sick or dying- he wants me to feel that compassion for His people all the time. The realization that life is fleeting, that each day should be a call to share Jesus' love with all around me- I should feel that call urgently every day.
And I realized; this time we're living in is actually a necessary time for Christians. God wants to use it to draw us closer to Him.
As a member of the worship team, I had gone into the previous Sunday preparing to record two services for the livestream. Chief on my mind was the arrangement of songs and how I'd sound and what outfit I would change into. But, on this day, in my living room with my leggings and stained t-shirt, fresh-faced and messy haired, all of that melted away. It was just me and God. Away from the thoughts about production — how fancy the camera angles are, how hype it is to sing our gospel rendition of Chance the Rapper before service, how good we sounded — I was able to sit with God, to bask in his presence.
I recalled this scripture from 1 Kings 19:11-13 when the Lord is about to appear to the prophet Elijah.
“At that moment, the Lord passed by. A great and mighty wind was tearing at the mountains and was shattering cliffs before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. 12 After the earthquake there was a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire there was a voice, a soft whisper.”
Maybe that's what this time is- a time when the distractions melt away, where those things (even well-intentioned) that keep us from hearing from God are gone, and it's finally quiet enough to hear that still small voice. He wants so desperately to commune with us, to spend time with Him, will we quiet ourselves and listen?